I’m So Thankful That I Don’t Look Like What I’ve Been Through

More often than not, women have said to me, “You’re so lucky; I wish I was like you; You have it all together; Do you know how many people would love be in your shoes?“ Often times, people look at where you are now but don’t see what you went through to get there. They have no idea about the crying, the pain, the lack of confidence, confusion and dysfunction. NOW I am confident, I am happy, I love my life. I feel more vibrant and alive than I’ve ever felt in my lifetime. But the journey to this happiness wasn’t glorious at all. There wasn’t anything glamorous about it. There were many nights I cried myself to sleep, depression was a real factor in my life, suicidal thoughts plagued my mind and I constantly worried about what others were thinking of me. I didn’t think I was gonna make it. But I survived and pressed on.

A lot of folks wouldn’t believe my testimony, that’s because I was taught a long time ago that when you’re going through hell, keep going. Don’t stand in the midst of your hell and whine and complain about it. Don’t stand in it and tell everybody how pitiful your life is. No one should be able to tell you’re “going through”. The whining and complaining and telling everybody that you’re suffering only causes judgment and more pain. Sometimes, it makes the journey lasts even longer. 

I had to learn to schedule my tears. I set aside a quiet time to do nothing more than cry. I’m talking about that ugly face cry, that cleansing cry, that healing cry. And afterwards, I got up, counted my blessings, remembered who I belonged to and I kept moving. Everyday is a blessing and I know that I’ll continue to have trials, that’s life, but I will continue to pray and try and remain confident in knowing that God’s got this.

I encourage you to keep going, keep striving, keep believing and keep moving forward. Be blessed and work with what God has given you. Don’t discredit Him by simply wishing you were in someone else’s shoes. Pray and speak your way to confidence, self love and peace.  Make the rest of your life, the best of your life.